January….

Good morning and welcome to my January.  I’m not sure quite where to start so I’ll start with the thought that brought me back here today.

I’ve been watching videos (hasn’t everyone?) that show women with children and women who are older and young women.  Women in all phases of their lives. It’s been fascinating to see how everyone goes about their day and hear their thoughts. I’ve noticed that:

The older women are inspiring and sometimes make me feel like a slug.

The young women with children make me tired

The very young women make me smile and laugh. And sometimes make me feel lazy.

Maybe I should stop watching videos…..

Or maybe, just maybe, I should not compare myself to everyone I see on the internet.

As I have said before, I am a 67 year old woman who works full time as a social worker for a community mental health center.  Not a physically demanding job but somedays it is mentally exhausting.  I try to practice self care and for the most part I do.  Sometimes I forget and run myself ragged and then I pay the price.  I’ve noticed that my stamina and strength is not what it was.  I could probably do something about that but I haven’t worked myself up to it yet.

I had covid in early 2022 and was sick for a long time.  I had a form of long covid that sapped my energy level (and changed my tastebuds forever).  I got my stamina back but not completely.  I went through my days doing what I could and resting when I need to.  It works for me and I don’t let myself feel guilty for having to rest.

This past December, I feel like I lost an entire month (which is screwing with my brain!).  I got sick with what I thought was norovirus in early December but after a few days knew it was not that.  My husband insisted we go to the ER because the intestinal distress and vomiting did not stop.  They sent me home after pumping me full of fluids.  In two days, we were back and this time they admitted me and I hung out there for the next 4 days.

After 4 days of tests, cultures, visits from specialists and a few quarts of blood given up, they had (or have) no idea what was making me sick. I was unable to keep any food in my body and my energy was gone completely.  Running from my bed to the bathroom used up what little I had and I would collapse on the bed.  I finally remembered all those grandmothers in novels offering “hot sweet tea” when someone was feeling poorly.  I asked for some and a lovely nurse’s aide came back with tea and sugar.  That was the first thing I could keep in my stomach and the sugar made my brain fog lessen and gave me some energy.  From that time on, I had a cup of tea at all times and when I came home, my husband got me some egg drop soup.  It was warm and salty and had protein.  It was perfect.

Slowly, I added foods (crackers with cream cheese, small bits of tortilla chips with melted cheese, egg salad on crackers) and was able to stand long enough to get washed and then finally to shower. THAT felt amazing.  Clean is underrated.  As my brain fog lifted and I was able to pay attention more, I ordered Christmas presents through the mail and made some vague plans.  Christmas was all about the “good enough” this year.  El made torte with direction and I was able to make babka.  Everything else was left alone.

I cannot ever thank my husband and daughter enough for the amount of cleaning up they had to do while I was sick.  It was nasty and messy and they never once complained or got angry.  I appreciate them so very much.

So, here we are in January.  My Christmas things are coming down this weekend.  Our car is in the shop and we are waiting to find out why it won’t start (please don’t let it be the fuel pump).  Things are back to normal…..

Back to where I started.  The women whose videos show them moving through their busy days

Keeping house and wrangling children (and in one case, baking all their bread and cooking from scratch) and keeping the house clean and neat make me feel inadequate.  It shouldn’t because I know that they are showing carefully curated views of their lives and who knows what things look like every day.  My house is not always a mess.  I try hard to keep it straightened because it makes me feel calm and at peace.  In short, I do the best I can and I have to learn to let myself off the hook for not being a perfect housekeeper.

I was raised by a mother who had very firm ideas of how things should be done and how women should look, (“5 pounds lost would make a big difference you know”).  Nothing was ever good enough.  Letting go of that “not good enough” feeling is hard but I am finally getting there. We are clean enough to be healthy and neat enough to make us comfortable.  And if we want to spend the weekend in pajamas watching movies, then we do that.  Life is too short to be worried about the dust on the shelves.

We got our first snow in years.  It was not much but it was so beautiful to watch.  Now it’s just cold.  Really cold.  I am grateful for the heater we had installed a short time ago.

I am getting things together to start a craft group at work.  Not focusing on arts and crafts but on the good feelings you get when you immerse yourself in a favorite activity.  I’m hopeful but I’ve tried to have groups before and people feel like they need to justify the time they are taking from work and they don’t always feel ok about that.  I want the managers to give their workers the green light to take part in some group activities. Cross your fingers!

Now it’s time for lunch.  I’m going to eat and then knit for a bit.  And maybe watch some of Jimmy Carter’s funeral.  What a good man.

Well, hello friend.

It’s almost Hallowe’en and I am looking forward to it.  

this year we have a new addition to our family.  Well, actually, two new additions.  We have the octopus and tentacles and we have a skeleton who keeps the dragon in line.
We decorated our front window with witches and bats and ghosts (and skeleton lights).  In a week when the holiday is gone, we’ll take all of the specifically Hallowe’en decorations down and leave the leaves and plain pumpkins up until after Thanksgiving.  

We’ll go and get our tree the day after Thanksgiving and then have our family over for dinner (Chinese, not turkey!). My girls cook and eat with their inlaws.  If I want us to be together, we’ll have to do it the day after.  I don’t shop on Black Friday, except for our tree.

I like cooking dinner on Thanksgiving.  Nothing fancy, just the same foods lovingly prepared.  I once suggested a change in the menu and you’d have thought I’d suggested we run naked around the block.

Fortunately, if I use the oven on convection, the turkey will cook in a few hours and I can watch the parades.  I love to see marching bands (I was a majorette in high school.  I can still twirl somewhat) and I wait for them.

I voted a few weeks ago and now feel perfectly justified turning off the speeches and newscasters interpreting polls.  I don’t remember feeling as apprehensive for an election.  The last time Trump ran, I was sure he would lose.  It goes to show why I am not an election interpreter.  Now that I know it can happen, my anxiety goes up often.

I have been working on a scrap blanket.  I’m crocheting little granny squares with left over sock yarns.  It’s much better than any of the other attempts to use up bits and bobs of yarn.It’s a satisfying thing to work on.  Each little square is with a different yarn and the rows pile up slowly.

We went last weekend to Johnson’s farm for hay rides, corn mazes and pumpkin picking.  We had a good time!  We got there early and beat most of the crowds.  This coming weekend we’re planning to take a picnic lunch to Allaire state part and ride the Pine Creek RR.  They also have a flea market.  And I just found out James will be here with us so it will be extra fun.

Tomorrow is my regular work from home day.  I love it.  This week I can work from home on Wed and Thurs since my group is having a party and I don’t have to be there.  I can sleep almost an extra hour and not have to travel.  I do my laundry on Wed since I am home and working anyway.  I’ll also order our groceries for Thursday so we won’t have to do the putting away over the weekend.  I will be having a long weekend because I took off Monday for my 67th birthday.  This year I am giving myself the gift of a day off.  I feel like I could use it.

Well, time to sign off so I can hold the hand of the love of my life.  He says he falls asleep better (and who am I to argue?). I hope you are all doing well and are having a peaceful autumn.

See you soon.

Good morning!  Welcome to my Wednesday.  I like Wednesdays because I get to work from home.  I can have any distraction I want/need running in the background and still get my work done.

I started this blog, or re-started it to be more accurate, with the intention of writing at least once a week.   One month in and I’ve already fallen off the schedule.  No, I haven’t been super busy, just normal busy.  I think I am out of the habit of writing and need to get back to it.   I enjoy writing and sharing bits of my normal life.  There’s a vlogger I follow who shows the “messy sides of life” because as she says, “I’ve got nothing to lose and people need to be reminded that life is not perfectly organized shelves and spotless kitchens”

Hmm.  I’d settle for organized.  In that vein, it’s the time of year when I start to declutter cosets and drawers for the change in seasons.  I try to do this twice a year.  Last week I straightened out and cleaned my drawers and cabinets in the kitchen.  It took about half a day but I am happy with it.  Next week end I will be switching out our summer clothes for the winter ones.  I use that chore to clean out my drawers and closet and give away things that I do not wear.  I have a hard time letting things go.  My brain says, “but what if we want to wear that after we give it away?”.    I’ve been watching a few youtube videos about how we don’t need to feel bad if we don’t have all of the things that people show on the internet.  I think the important thing is to figure out what makes you happy and feel content and go for those things.

 I have a lot of bits and bobs of sock yarn in a container.  I saw this small granny square “scrap” blanket and thought I’d give it a try.  Mine looks wonky, I don’t crochet often and I’m not sure blocking will smooth this out.  I think I’ll put it aside and try a different hook size and maybe crochet a bit looser.  I like this method because you join the squares as you go along.  No sewing up.  It’s a bit fiddly and I think I need to practice a bit more to make it smoother.

I voted last week and am now giving myself permission not to pay attention to any more political ads, interviews, debates, news articles…..  It has become mentally exhausting.  The choice seems so clear and obvious to me.  One more month to go.

Speaking of time, 12 weeks from today is January 1, 2025.  There are only 12 weeks left in this year.  This year, like every year before it, has gone very fast.  You’d think we’d be used to it by now but no, we are not.  

There goes my dryer signal.  Time to move the clothes along.  Have a happy, peaceful and fulfilling week.

Good morning!  Happy Sunday.  I hope your day is going well.  It’s the last week of summer here and the weather is up and down and all over.  We haven’t had much rain lately and our garden was almost a complete bust.  We got a small handful of cherry tomatoes that were delicious but Pk planted so much more.  It all went to the local deer and rabbits.  Next year, we will try an electric fence.  It’s a last resort

A little while ago, we went to the Frankine Institute’s show, The Art of the Brick.  Legos, legos and more legos.  This is one of my favorites.  It could be modeled on my husband and I.  We are oldish and not in the best shapes of our lives but are still “upright and sucking wind”, (one of Pk’s favorite sayings).  We still like to hold hands when we walk and we definitely have the rolls….

The show was amazing.  What you can do with plastic bricks!  This is one of my favorites
It is called Decisions and is made with 112, 363 individual bricks.  I think a better name might be Hope.  The hands rising from below to touch the forms suspended above.  I can’t imagine how much time it must have taken.

I have a fondness for audio books.  Most books that I “read”, I download and listen to.  Chirp is a good service if you want an audio book and don’t want to join a subscription service or pay a lot of money.  Chirp has a daily email listing some bargains for the day.  They are usually older books or an author’s lesser known selections.  I have quite a collection.  At the moment I am listening to Here one Moment by Liane Moriarty.  I love her stories.  Big Little Lies is one of my favorites.  When I find an author I like, I look for their back list.  Most of the time, I am rewarded with new stories that I am already inclined to like.  That’s how I read all of Steven King’s books.  One after another.  I enjoy some more that others but am always entertained.

One of the things I like best about audiobooks is that I am a visual learner.  When I hear a story, I remember most of the story (or some bits of it) but often forget a lot of the details.  I can listen to them repeatedly and not be bored.  I mostly listen to fiction but a few non fiction books have caught my interest.  One is Women in Clothes by Sheila Heti et al.  It is a fascinating look at why people have favorite clothes and how we learn about fashion.  

This was an interesting week.  I had a routine dr appt and got my flu shot (I have to get one for work).  It knocked me off my feet.  I always have a strong reaction to vaccines.  Last year, I got a covid shot along with my flu shot and was a mess for a few days.

My oldest daughter will be 41 this week ( I KNOW I am not old enough to be her mom).  We are going to Green Dragon Farmer’s Market.  It’s supposed to be “the number 2 farmer’s market in the US” and only opened on Fridays.  I love a good farmers market!  This one is in Ephrata, PA which is the heart of Amish country so I know the baked goods and meats will be exceptional. It meant taking a day off of work but I think will be well worth it.  I’ll let you know!

I hope you have a good, satisfying week.

See you next week!

What you think on grows…..again

Hello!

How are you? 

This is me,

I am Donna Lee.  I am many things, a soon to be 67 year old woman, a wife of 43 years, a mother of 3 and a grandmother of one.  (I know, I know, I take terrible selfies). I haven’t written or posted a blog post in a few years.  I think the pandemic made me shy away from social media. Weird?  Yea, I know.  It drove or beckoned so many folks to take part and join the online community.  I have a new appreciation for those people and the work they put into their channels, websites and all their reels.  I still enjoy the slice of life posts where someone brings us along for their day.  I like seeing how other people live and what they think and what they believe is important.

Me?  To me, the most important thing is being my honest self.  I don’t edit photos or pretend to be someone I am not.  I am too old for that stuff.  I don’t mind turning 67 at all.  My body may mind some days more than others, but mentally and emotionally it’s cool.  I like the person I am now better than the person I was back in my 20’s.  I am kinder and less judgemental.  I can more easily appreciate someone else’s goodness or good fortune and not always wish it were mine.

I have been married since 1981 to my high school sweetheart and love of my life.  We seem to still enjoy each other’s company (and oddly finish each other’s sentences or say the same thing at the same time) and like doing some of the same things.  Only some.  We each have hobbies and interests that are separate.

He likes woodworking and gardening.  He is retired (because he’s a contractor and his contract was not renewed in 2020 and it was easier to retire than to continually send out resumes into the wind and not hear anything back.  Ageism is real).

I am still working.  I work as a social worker in behavioral health.  This involves working with psychiatrists to provide community mental health services in Philadelphia.  I have been doing the same job for 30 years. I look forward to retiring but have a few projects around the house that need to be taken care of.  I like to knit, spin, sew, read, cook, talk and watch sci fi and horror movies.  Godzilla minus one was so good!  Watching really bad movies is something my husband and I share.  We’ve seen some doozies recently.  The Shark Exorcist comes to mind…..

I have been reading an interesting book, Craft Psychology by Dr Anne Kirketerp.  It was just published in English.  

It is an interesting look at how craft (any kind of handicraft) can help calm a frazzled brain, help people become more relaxed and refreshed.  Her theory is that if you sit and do nothing all day, you are tired and restless at the end of the day, not refreshed because your brain goes to the “what if” place and it is usually not a positive place to spend the day.  If you engage in a craft that is challenging enough to require your attention but not so hard that you are sweating the details, your brain goes into a state she calls “flow”.  And that is what helps your whole being feel refreshed and renewed.  

She has the data to back up her theories and it makes for interesting reading.  I don’t think it’s earth shattering.  It’s an idea that I have had for a long time.  The peace that my mind feels when I sit at my spinning wheel and find my rhythmn, is real and not duplicated by anything else in my life.   I have been crafting my whole life.  I don’t know what people who don’t have hobbies do with themselves.

We used to have a Wellness Fair at work and I would always get the table devoted to leisure time activities.  I think a lot of the people who attended the fair didn’t necessarily think of my leisure activities as pertaining to health but they all took one of the small craft kits I put together for knitters, sewists or crocheters.  I have taught many of my clients over the years how to knit or crochet and several kept up with it.  In a few weeks I have a woman coming in for her appt with the dr and afterwards we are going to have lunch and I will teach her to knit.  I will get a beautiful skein of red yarn and some comfortable needles and show her how to get more “flow” into her life.

I have a case load of around 100 people at the moment.  It’s a lot.  Trying to keep up with them and making sure everyone gets what they need and gets the help they ask for is what keeps me busy.  I also run 2 groups a week in our Adult Day Program.  Leisure Activities (currently Bingo) and a Poetry group.

I like my job and I am good at it.  I don’t know how I will walk away when retirement beckons.  And I think I want to go back to posting here.  Not every day but hopefully every week and maybe twice a week.  I can be ambitious.

So, pull up a chair, take out your craft supplies and once we have all had our chance to find some inner peace, we can talk about it.

See you soon.

Happy Sunday!  I am sitting here working on my sweater made with the cashmere yarn my husband gave me for my birthday last year.I’m further along than this.  I have 2/3 of one sleeve to finish and then the washing, blocking and weaving in.  The yarn comes from a small collective in Mongolia.  It doesn’t feel like much in the ball but once it’s knit up, wow.  What a transformation.  I put it away for the warm weather and now I have the boring boring boring part of just plain knitting around and around....  I looked a long time to find a pattern that would work with my yarn.  I wanted enough design to make it interesting but not too much so that the yarn itself didn’t shine.  It’s too much to carry to work for my lunch time knitting or my knitting group, so I should be faithful and work on it at home every night until it’s done.  The operative word in that sentence is should.  

Friday night, Pk and I went on a date.  We had dinner and a concert of old folk singers.  The dinner was unforgettable but not because it was good.  The concert was wonderful.  Chris Eberhart, Patti Larkin, Cheryl Wheeler, John Gorka and Christine Lavin.  Not heard of them?  I’m not surprised.  They are singer/songwriters and they have stories to tell.  John Gorka is a NJ native.  He won the night with his song, “I’m from NJ”.  The chorus is, “I’m from NJ, I don’t expect too much.  If the world ended today, I’d adjust”.  Of course at a concert in NJ, that would go over well.  We were in a small, old theater which added to the charm.  We got lucky and the 2 seats next to me were empty and I could move over so we had some extra room.  The seats were close together and build for a population that was less broad in the beam.  It was interesting to be in an audience full of white haired people watching a stage full of white haired people.

Yesterday, I was productive.  All of the laundry got done and put away, the bathroom got cleaned and I spent a good part of the day cleaning our bedroom.  It really wasn’t a mess but we have a tendency to just put things on shelves and in the corner and eventually it piles up.  I cleaned up my little shelving unit of yarn/wips and what a difference.  I stirred up a lot of dust which made me sneeze.

I wanted things straightened up because I want to put some holiday things in our room as well as the rest of the house.  I ordered a duvet cover with snowflakes (we have a duvet and are waiting for our everyday cover to come.  It’s a new thing for us).  I also got a holiday shower curtain.  For some reason, I am feeling very holiday like this year.  I can’t wait to have Thanksgiving dinner and then perhaps go out to Lancaster for the day after to do some holiday food shopping.  That weekend will be decorating time.  

I slept for 10 hours last night.  I must have been more tired than I thought.  Today is a low energy day.  One of the ways I am always reminded that I am no longer 18 is that if I spend a day doing physical work, the next day is a slow day for me.  I don’t mind.  I watch movies, listen to books and knit or spin.  Today it’s Star Wars.  I can do the boring sleeve knitting and say the lines along with the characters.  

My car is back from the shop (again).  This time for a brake line.  Sigh.  It’s time to put it out to pasture and look for a newer car.  I really don’t want another car payment.  We have 2 years left on our Rav4.  It would be nice if my old car could last til then

.  Our grandson has decided that he is a superhero. He likes to have his blankets tied around his neck.  His mother thought she would be smart and made him a cape with some of his favorite fleecy material.  Does he use it as a cape?  Nope.  He goes for his blankets instead.  He is growing up so fast (I know, I know, they all do).  He’s a superhero to me.

Well, time to go back to my sleeve.  Soon it will be time to start the jambalaya for dinner.  A perfect dish for the cold grey day we are having.  

Have a superb week.

Guess who is 62 now?  That’s right, it’s this woman.  I wore my witch hat for Hallowe’en and my tunic with stars and had my familiar with me.  I enjoyed the day.  We had a party at work and then I came home and gave out candy to the few kids who came to our door.  There are fewer and fewer houses participating and fewer and fewer kids.  

We had a Chinese food celebration on Saturday night and the girls came for my birthday.  I got to introduce my grandson to fried dumplings and udon noodles with chicken.  He was more interested in playing with the noodles than eating them but he did a good job managing the little fork to pick them up.

Monday was my actual birthday and Elanor sent me flowers at work.  They’re just beautiful.  Daisies (one of my favorite flowers) and pink roses and pink polka dotted ribbon.  She knows me well.

We have begun the quick slide into the holidays.  I absolutely love this time of year.  I love cooking Thanksgiving dinner, even though it will be just 3 of us.  The number doesn’t matter, it’s the ritual of the baking of the pies, the making of the fruit relish and the baking of the cornbread for the stuffing.  I have one month to practice baking in our new oven.  It’s been a long time since I really worried about something splattering in the oven or boiling over on the stove.  Now, I feel honor bound to scrub all the messes up right away.  I know the time will come when we pay less attention to these things but the stove is still new and shiny.  

Our stove hood should be delivered next week and then we have to choose tile to go up on the wall behind it.  Slowly but surely, we are doing the things we’ve wanted to do but have not been able to since Pk’s job was not secure (it still isn’t secure but it’s less insecure now than it was before).  Being a contractor is not conducive to long range planning.  

We have to wait to see how Kate and Patrick want to work out the holiday visitation schedule.  James has 5 grandparents who would all like to be with him for Christmas morning.  There is just not enough room and it would be too much commotion with all of us and the dogs.  We figured, Kate will let us know what’s best for Jamie.  

I got Lindt chocolate advent calendars for the girls for December, Peter Kevin got one from the Metropolitan Museum of Art (it’s a pop up tree with 24 little birds to put on, one for each day) and I got a yarn advent calendar.  24 little skeins and then a pattern to use with them at the end.  

We wrapped up the fig tree and are putting the garden to bed for the winter.  There are 2,000 bulbs waiting to be planted for next spring.  Pk does not do things halfway......

One more hour and I can head home.  I have 10 more angels to finish for the ornament exchange and if I’m lucky, I’ll finish them today.  The crocheting is all done, just the assembling has to be done.  

Aren’t they adorable?  Otherwise, I have no firm plans for holiday knitting.  If I finish the Swedish Fish socks, I’ll wrap them up for Pk, I have some other things otn that may become gifts.  I haven’t done much spinning lately.  I think I might enjoy that for a while.

How about you?  Are you making plans?  Are you already in the midst of preparations?  Do you enjoy this time of year?

Bye for now!

Boo!

These scary things are on my front yard. We’ve been collecting the minions for a few years and the tree is a new addition.  (We have a great fondness for the minions).On the other side are these plastic jack-o-lanterns and real pumpkins.  They are colorful in the day and just a bit spooky in the darkThe light on the wall says Beware!  I love Hallowe’en and Peter Kevin loves decorating outside.  The outside is mostly his.  He asks for my opinion but then chooses what he wants to do.  I’m ok with that since all of the indoor decorating is to my taste.

Life here has been good.  The weather is getting cooler.  I wish my allergies would go into hibernation but some days they seem to be worse than they were all spring/summer.  I’ve been feeling tired and I am starting to think it’s the statin that my endocrinologist has started me on.  My cholesterol numbers are good but she thinks they should be lower because of the diabetes.  I reluctantly took the statin and for the last 6 weeks or so, I have felt lethargic no matter how much sleep I get.  I don’t like feeling like this and I looked it up online.  Sure enough, statins have a few minor side effects but one of them is increased fatigue.

I am going to stop taking it and see if it makes a difference.  I know she is only doing what she thinks is best for me but I don’t like feeling like I have no energy.  There are too many things to do!

Last weekend we took Jamie to Allaire State Park to go to the Flea Market and ride the Oak Creek RR.  The flea mkt was a hit.  He seemed to enjoy walking around and touching all the things (and talking to all the dogs because grandmom would not let him touch them).  Then he heard the train’s whistle.  Not really a whistle at all but an air horn.  Holy moly it was loud and jarring and his poor 19 month old self couldn’t handle it.  No train rides this year.  Maybe next time.

Peter Kevin and I went to Smithville for our 38th anniversary brunch.  It was elegant and delicious as usual.  We walked around a little and then hit the flea mkt of a small town on our way home.  I bought something I’ve never seen before, a wooden folding rocking chair.  It’s small and low to the ground but really clever.  I want to clean it up some and put new fabric on the seat and back.

I am loving our new fridge and now we are on the lookout for a new stove and then a dishwasher.  We figured we should probably get the appliances while Peter Kevin is still working.  I’ve never bought new appliances before the old ones broke down before and it’s been interesting.  I like shopping and examining all of the various models.    And then we look at cabinets and try to decide what we want our kitchen area to look like.  

I got my hair cut last week and I love it.  It’s rather short and I’m thinking of asking Kate to put some color on it.  It’s so easy to take care of.  I do miss my curls but it could be worse.  

Well, off to an All Staff Meeting (not usually very exciting but mandatory).  Happy Wednesday!

Good morning and Happy Friday!  I am sitting at my desk and eating some soda bread I made in March.  I found it while I was transferring the food from the old fridge to the new one.  I always make 4 or 5 loaves and freeze or give away all but one.  We take them out once in a while and slather them with butter.  Mmmmmmm.

Peter Kevin has managed to catch Jamie's cold (you will remember we had him most of last weekend).  This is unusual.  I am the one that usually catches whatever germs/viruses happen to be near.  I have not gotten sick.  My arm is sore from my mandatory flu shot though.

Peter Kevin had jury duty yesterday.  I don't know anyone that says "Yay! Jury duty!".  I have been called for federal level jury duty and local and state.  I don't really mind it but the waiting around to be called or to be sent home is so boring.  Our local court is in a neighborhood I am not familiar with and looks a bit sketchy.  He didn't get called and got sent home at 11:30.  Not a bad thing and he got to rest so he could go to work today.  When you are a contractor, you only get paid if you work.

We have one of those weekends coming up that has no scheduled activities.  We will get the old refrigerator out of the living/dining room and put it into its new place in the downstairs area next to the chest freezer.  It will come in handy during the holidays when I am looking for a large space to defrost a turkey or hold extra cold beverages.  The new fridge is so shiny.  Everything is in its place inside.  I give it 2 weeks before things are all over the place.

I have vague plans to switch out the summer/winter clothes and I want to put up the Fall decorations.  Inside the house, these things are mostly orange and brown.  The girls used to call it "getting out the orange stuff".  Outside, it involves finding placement for the 8' dragon, 10' Hallowe'en tree and 3 3' minions in costumes.  Yes, I am afraid we have become THAT family.  We have inflatable decorations for most holidays (including an inflatable Peep for Easter).

One of the things I like about it is that from now until January, our house will be decorated.  Usually by the time I take down the Christmas decorations, I am tired of all the things on all the surfaces and look forward to our everyday stuff.

One weekend soon, we have to clean out the rec room area.  We use it as a basement, mostly for storage.  I also have to clean up the craft room.  It is a disaster and it get on my nerves if I have to go in there for something.  I think I'm going to have to do one of those things where I set a timer for 15 minutes and do it in stages.  Otherwise, it will never get cleaned up.

Well, that's about it for my part of the world.  Once again, I have managed to prattle on for a full page without saying anything.  But, since it's Friday, here are a few things I am thankful for this week:

-cooler temperatures

-crock pots

-soccer games on television

-sneakers

-trees that change color and evergreens that provide some of the only color all winter long.

How about you?  What are you thankful for?  Have a great weekend.

This is what the sky looked like as I waited for the train this morning.  It never got really nice (nor did it get dark and stormy).  It was just a cool, cloudy day.  Very,very nice after the hot, humid weekend.

You know how you have vague plans for your weekend?  Grocery shopping, swapping out the summer clothes, cleaning out the craft room (which has become the “I don’t know where to put this so I’ll put it in here” room), yardwork, etc, etc.  Our weekend plans mostly went out the window.  Thursday night, my sweet, innocent grandson poked his father in the eye.  He scratched Patrick’s cornea causing him great pain.  They went to Urgent Care on Thursday night and by Friday morning, Patrick had a red, swollen, very painful eye.  I left work and took James so they could do what they needed to do.  He is young enough to need constant looking after and Kate had her hands full with Patrick.

So, twist my arm reeeaaalllly hard and make me take care of my grandson!  Jamie ended up spending most of the weekend with us while Kate and Patrick got his eye sorted.  We had things that had to get done and things that could wait.  We went shopping for a new refrigerator.  There is nothing mechanically wrong with our current one but we have not liked it since we bought it 12 years ago.  It was a quick purchase when our old fridge broke and it was what we could afford.  

The new one comes as a result of a surprise bonus from work.  It didn’t pay for the entire fridge but about 1/3 of it.  We were able to decide what we wanted/needed and spent a lot of time looking online before we went out to the store.  And we took James.  He enjoyed the day.  He opened every refrigerator on the sales floor.  We chose a french door refrigerator with 2(!) ice makers.  We use a lot of ice.  


It’s being delivered tomorrow.  It means I am taking another day off, and will have Jamie with me as Kate takes Patrick back to Wills Eye Hospital to get checked.  I don’t mind the day off but I am going to be stretched tight when it comes time to take off the time at the holidays I usually take.

Saturday we took James to Johnson’s Corner Farm to take a hay ride and pick a pumpkin.  Unfortunately, the line was so long, and he is so little, it would not have been worth it to stand in the line.  We walked around and with all the things he could see and touch, what did he choose to play with?   The mulch.  We chose several pumpkins

        Of all shapes and colors.  Some of them will get carved.  Some we’ll just save the seeds and plant them next year.

It was too crowded to easily shop in their farm store so I got some blueberries so James could have a snack.

We came home exhausted and hot and dusty.  There was DinoTrucks on the television and chicken fingers and french fries for dinner.  It’s part of the beauty of being a grandparent.  I don’t worry about his eating healthy for every meal.  I just feed him what he likes.

Saturday night we had to make sure he was asleep before we put him into the porta crib because he can climb out of it now.  He’s tall and strong for an 18 month old child.  We all watched the movie Babies (if you’ve never seen it, watch it. It follows 4 babies from different cultures from their birth to their first year) and James finally fell asleep hard enough to be picked up and put in the crib.  He slept through the night and we got up early Sunday morning and did some of the other chores we had put off.  The bed linens got changed and the laundry got done.  The rest of the groceries were put away and things were generally cleaned up.  We collapsed into our chairs when Kate came and took James home.  

And today was Monday and the week starts all over again.  I have groups of Temple Univ. students coming to my group this week.  They will be with us for 8 weeks.  They’re rec therapy majors and for some of them, this is the first time they’ve met individuals who have mental illness.  It is an eye opening experience for them and my group loves it.  I think they get tired of hearing my voice all the time.

Tonight we are making pizzas on naan bread.  I hope it’s as good as I imagine it will be.  I can hear Elanor upstairs laughing.  I’m going to go see what’s so funny.  I could use a good laugh.

Deja vu.....

It will be October soon and my thoughts are already turning to Hallowe’en.  It’s one of my favorite holidays.  I have decorated my office window with some friendly looking guys.  The best part is that when you walk down the hall, you can see my window.  It’s very popular.  I have had an office to myself for 2 years now, since my office mate retired.  I cleaned out years of saved papers and got a new floor lamp so I don’t have to use the 

                                                                                                              Overhead lights.  They buzz and it drives me crazy.  I bought the witch’s hat for myself from a crafter on Etsy.  She is in the Ukraine and I am glad I thought to order it in August because it came last week, plenty of time for me to put together a costume for Hallowe’en that is work appropriate (and comfortable.  Mustn’t be uncomfortable all day at work.)  I found a tunic with stars stenciled across it and a cartoon witch’s broom.  The best part will be wearing my hat.  

I know I haven’t written a word in almost a year.  I don’t want to bore you with a long explanation of what I have been doing and why I didn’t keep you all informed.  I’ll give you some bullet points:

-I stopped coloring my hair and started dyeing it in rainbow colors.  It’s now naturally a silver/white color so the blue and purple and red and green and yellow show up brilliantly for about 2 weeks and then they fade.  They look pastel and rather pretty as they fade.

-my grandson is 18 months old and cute and very smart.  I am glad to be the grandmom and not the mom for this kid.  He is a handful.

-Pk has a job as a contractor for a company that monitors/manages the electric grid for several states.  The commute is a long one but they pay him well.

-I was diagnosed with Type II diabetes after a blood test showed a glucose level of 853 (which put me in the hospital in intensive care for 3 days).  I have lost 50 pounds and have been trying to be more mindful of my portion sizes and what I eat.  I learned a new phrase, “insulin dependent diabetic” and also learned how important those 3 words can be.

-I will turn 62 in a few weeks and the word Retirement keeps cropping up in conversation.

THAT is an interesting topic and everyone has their own idea of what that should look like.  Me?  Well, my retirement will be the pension my employer has for me and my SS payments.  If I put off retiring until I turn 70 (sounds really really old but it’s only 8 years away), I will collect a significant amount more each month.  My job can be mentally exhausting but it is a desk job and I could easily work another 8 years.  I like what I do even if it means most of my day is spent entering my client interactions into the medical records database.  I HATE EMR.  

My family is all well at the moment.  Well, Patrick has a scratched cornea courtesy of his son.  He is in quite a bit of pain today.  Hopefully, he will rest some tonight with the pain meds they gave him and tomorrow will be a better day for him.

I continue to knit and spin.  I am spinning some quivit that I got for Christmas last year.  I also have 2 sweaters in progress for myself and one for Jamie.  I finished a sweater for my nephew’s 4 yr old daughter and their soon to be born daughter.  I am really a process knitter.  I enjoy the feel of the yarns and the look of the rows piling up to form a garment.  I knit slow but I am very ok with that.

We will celebrate our 38th wedding anniversary in 2 weeks.  I have no idea what we are going to do.  They have been far and away mostly good years.  There were some tough times but we got through them and will get through the ones to come.  One of the good things about being long married and knowing your partner is knowing your partner.  I know I can disagree, sometimes strenuously, and while we may never see eye to eye on a subject, we can still discuss it and can agree to disagree.  And I know the love is there. 

My little corner of the world remains pretty much the same.  I’ll be getting “the orange” decorations out at home soon.  It’s always exciting to me because it is a signal that the holidays are fast approaching.  The weather is all over the place, 90’s one day, 70’s the next.  There have been gorgeous sunny days and there are some leaves just starting to turn color.

And to end with, here is a shot of my hair done rainbow colors by my daughter Kate.  I love it like this.  It is fun and I figure I’m old enough to do what I want with my hair.....and it’s only hair.  Since Kate is in school now and has an 18 month old toddler to keep track of, it’s harder for her to find the time.  I wait until she’s got some time and let her do what she wants.  I am never disappointed.

How are you?  Are you doing anything new and different?  Finish something you’ve been working on?  Start some new grand project?  I am feeling the pull of lace knitting.  It’s been a long while but I have so many wips now.  I really need to finish a few more things.

Have a peaceful weekend. My intention is to get back into regular writing, but we all know what is paved with all those good intentions, don’t we?  


 

November (already)

Hallowe’en is over and Fall is underway here in the northeastern US.  The warm weather kept the trees from showing off until this week.  Just as we begin to notice them, there is a storm that blows them off the trees.  Such is the weather in these times of climate change.  It was 75 degrees yesterday and today it will be 20 degrees colder (and windy!).  

October was a good month.  Pk and I celebrated our anniversary and had a lovely dinner talking about us and our lives and our dreams.  You’d think after 37 years we’d have run out of things to say but we haven’t.  One of the perks of a long relationship is that you can sit quietly without talking and it doesn’t feel awkward.  But there are always things to share.  Peter Kevin is the first person I think of when I hear something funny or sad or profound.  And thanks to technology, I can share it with him immediately.  

Tomorrow I will be 61 years old.  I keep asking myself, “How did that happen?”  In my mind, I don’t feel like a senior citizen but my white hair (well, right now it’s rainbow colored but the white is there) gives me away.  And the achy joints on a cold rainy day remind me that 18 is a long way in my past.  But I like myself more now than I did when I was 18.  I am more comfortable in my (less stretchy) skin.  I’m more likely to speak my mind, something I didn’t always have the confidence to do at 18.  I am more patient with people but say less patient with time wasting.  I am increasingly aware that I have lived more of my life than I have left (I’m pretty sure I will not live to 120) and things that cause me to wait and wait and wait make me irritable.  

For my birthday, I asked for some cashmere yarn from a kickstarter company in Mongolia.  I got enough to make a sweater and chose this one

.  It’s called Amun.  I have natural cream colored yarn and my pattern but realized I don’t have needles.....isn’t that always the way?  Amazon to the rescue.  They will be delivering them today and I can start on it.  I have been playing around with the pattern with some needles that may actually be the right size but since I always have trouble using the needle sizer (I can’t tell if the needle is supposed to slide through the hole or be stopped), I’m not sure.  The pattern has german short rows and I’m not familiar with them.  I like the fabric it’s making though.  It’s a bit extravagant but (this is me rationalizing it) I am a slow knitter and will get hours and hours of pleasure out of knitting it.  I’m still working on a sweater for me but I’m at the “just keep knitting around and around to make the sleeves and body” part of it.  It’s mindless.

Jamie is growing by leaps and bounds.  Literally.  He got used to the jumping chairseat we got for him and he just jumps up and down for long periods of time (his grandfather cannot keep up with him).  This is what they do best

Peter Kevin seems to be the only one he just falls asleep on.  Aren’t they precious together?

Life is good.  This is my favorite time of year.  What used to be the long slow slide into the holidays has now become the steep slope.  Thanksgiving is only 3 weeks away.  I am going to try a new apple pie recipe today to see if we like it.  The sun keeps trying to peep out from behind the clouds, my neighbor’s trees are a gorgeous copper color and are waving in the wind.  Peter Kevin and I are heading out for breakfast at a diner and then to Lowe’s to look at some holiday lights before they are all gone and then to Walmart to buy a new crockpot. (Our last one was rendering suet out in the garage and got knocked over.  Yes, it was an ugly mess.  All that liquid fat just poured out all over the cement floor).

What’s on your agenda?  Do you fill your weekends with errands?  Do you give yourself time to recharge or are you always busy?  I will make sure I get time to decompress and recharge.  My job is not physically demanding but it is often mentally and emotionally demanding.  I usually find some peace in a quiet time with the spinning wheel or a knitting project and a good audiobook.  Last night we relaxed and laughed watching WKRP in Cincinnati.  It’s very dated but the characters are familiar and loveable.  

And now we are heading off into the Fall morning.  Have a good weekend and don’t forget it’s the end of DST! (I get an extra hour of birthday!)

It’s October

What is a blog for?

I have been thinking about this for a while as I thought about whether there is any reason to continue to write and share in this space.  When I started, I used the space to talk about my knitting.  I was brand spanking new and was so proud when I finished anything (especially my first pair of striped socks, you’d have thought I invented them) that I had to share it with folks who would get it.

I talk about my family and what they mean to me and things we are going through.  This allowed me to get opinions and ideas from other people and look at things a bit differently.  Someone once said it was like getting together for a nice cup of tea and having a chat.  I like that idea and wish I could do that more often.

I guess it’s been like an edited diary that I have used to document events and share them.  “Edited” because I have always felt that although this is a place to talk honestly, there are some thoughts that should be kept to oneself.  Just because I think it doesn’t mean I have to say it.  

And now here I am.  Not much has changed.  I am still a knitter who likes to try new things and learn new things.  I have been spinning more and using my handspun to make things.  I am slow and don’t work well with deadlines.  I don’t do contests (like SockWars) anymore, I don’t promise anything I may not be able to finish.  And I don’t push myself to work quicker.  I’m older and have more patience.

I still have a dozen things otn at a time and that’s ok.  Usually that includes 3 or 4 pairs of socks, a shawl or scarf, a blanket or a sweater for my grandson.  Yep.  I am a grandmother.  James was born in March and has quickly become the second man in my life.

Being a grandmother has been such a joy.  We have Jamie days on the second Sunday of every month.  We pick him up in the morning and then keep him all day.  He usually falls asleep on his grandfather and they nap together.  He is beautiful and brilliant (of course) and just a happy little boy.

I have also grown all the hair dye out of my hair and now have snow white hair.  Snow white until Kate gets to work with the hair colors.

I have done this all summer and have had such a good time with my rainbow hair.

It fades out to pastel colors and is gone within a month.  We have a date for this Saturday.

My cataract surgery was a sucess and my vision is pretty good, as long as I’m wearing my glasses.  I have managed to lose 45 pounds and my diabetes is under good control.  I miss being able to eat what I want when I want it (and as much as I want) but I have felt so much better and that is worth it.  I do eat sweets, just fewer and if I am going to eat the carbs they have to be GOOD carbs!

My family is doing well.  I’m pulling out the decorations for the holidays.  First Hallowe’en and then Thanksgiving and then Christmas.  Only 12 weeks til Christmas.  I have a few presents planned and will hopefully get them done.  I am not that ambitious but I do like to give handmade gifts.  My latest handmade gift was a baby surprise jacket.  What a fun pattern!  I used Lion Brand Mandala and while I liked it for it’s durability, I’m not sure I like the way it feels when it’s knit up.

I got the buttons on amazon.  

I’m still working at the same place, and still like my job.  It keeps me on my toes.  In a month, I’ll be 61.  How weird is that?  I am getting to be a Little Old Lady and I am ok with that.  Next week Peter Kevin and I will celebrate our 37th anniversary.  We are lucky and we know it.  We have a life that brings us joy and what more can you really ask for?

Watch this space.......

Good things are bound to happen.

It’s been almost a month and while it has zoomed by, it’s been full.

A week ago, I had the cataract removed from my left eye.  I get to tape the lovely plastic device to my face at night so I don’t inadvertently rub my eye as it continues to heal.  I have 20/20 vision in that eye now!  As a person who has worn glasses since I was 7, it’s remarkable.   I have a small cataract in my right eye but that one will wait.  The vision in that eye is 20/50 and is correctable to 20/20. In about 2 weeks, after my eye has had more time to heal, I will get new glasses and be able to see clearly for the first time in months.

Look at that grey hair!  It was sorely in need of a good cutting so the day after the surgery, I got it done.  It felt so much better.  And there’s almost no color left in it.

This is right after we left the hairdressers.  She always dries it with bangs but I mostly push them back.  I love my hair color.  I like it short.  It makes me feel a bit more modern and less old-lady-like.  If my mother were alive, she would be scolding me right now.  She colored her hair until the day she died.  She thought women should never let people know how old they are.  Well, I am 60 and this is what 60 looks like on me.  

We’re going to a “sprinkle” for Kate this weekend.  It’s a small baby shower.  She is nearing the end of her pregnancy and will be very glad when it’s over.  This baby is very active and has managed to kick Kate hard enough to send her to the ER with pains.  Could be a good soccer player coming into the world!

Peter Kevin is still looking for a job but El had an interview today at a local store.  Fingers are crossed for her to be successful.  

I’m home today because it’s parade day in Philadelphia after the Eagles won the Super Bowl last Sunday.  They expect 3 million people to crowd into the city today.  Since I normally travel into the city for work each day, all of these people would make that commute difficult to say the least.  I opted to use a vacation day.  There were lines out of the  train stations and around the buildings today.  And they stopped selling tickets last night so some of those people may be disappointed.

That’s City Hall in the background.  (Full disclosure, I did not take the photo.  I found it online and borrowed it). Look at all those people! My brother and his wife are huge fans.  He’s been waiting for this his entire life.  They are the people who paint their faces and go to games.  We are not football fans in our house.  We watched the game on Sunday and it was exciting enough to keep our interest. The only game we watch regularly is the Army/Navy game.  So going to the parade was not something we even considered.  I’m content to look at the crowd from the comfort of my living room.

Today, I am going to do some knitting and smell the stew I’ve got going in the crockpot.  It’s a beautiful day.  Sunny and cold.  Not a bad day for a parade, or for sitting with some hot coffee and watching the world go by.

It’s a full 10 degrees warmer today.  But it’s dark and cloudy and a storm in moving in bringing slushy rain and snow.  Just lovely for commuting.

I am an English Major (once an English major, always an English major).  Words fascinate me.  I would have majored in linguistics if I could have thought of some way to turn that into a career way back when.

I learned two new phrases this week.  One is ‘insulin dependent diabetic’.  I’ve only had a diagnosis of diabetes since October and in no way consider myself an expert on diabetes (just on my diabetes).  I have learned that when people hear you are taking insulin, they get a little weird.  To me, it’s just another medication.  But something about the word makes folks nervous.  

It also changes the way doctors planning procedures look at you.  I am scheduled for cataract surgery on Feb 2.  I am looking forward to it and thought it was a fairly simple procedure, (compared with the retinal surgery of two and a half years ago).  Well, it turns out that as an Insulin Dependent Diabetic, I get to be scheduled early in the morning so as not to upset the blood sugar too much (good thing), the healing time might be a bit longer (not as good thing) and I don’t have a choice about the antibiotic injection in my eye (yucky thing).

They give you a paper and ask IF you want the injection and thereby avoiding 4 weeks of eyedrops (4x day).  I was going to have eyedrops anyway because of the diabetes so I said no, thank you.  Turns out, I can’t say No Thank You.  I get both.

Life just gets more and more interesting.  

The other phrase I learned is “actively passing”.  It is used by hospice folks to describe the very end stage of life.  My sister in law, who has been fighting cancer for over 15 years is actively passing.  She is one of the warmest, kindest, best people I know and it breaks my heart.  She is 56.

F’ing cancer.

I can’t end on that note so here’s a thought from Martin Luther King, jr.

“Faith is taking that first step when you cannot see the whole staircase”

I don’t think it matters what your faith is (or isn’t), just taking the first step toward something is a hopeful, positive action.  My social rehab poetry group chose “prejudice” as their subject this week.  It should be interesting to see how they interpret the word.

Have a peaceful Tuesday.

The last photo of the tree.  I am always glad to get it out of the living room after the holidays but it’s always a wrench on my heart.  I know next year’s tree will be just as beautiful but it almost feels like part of our family after living with us for a month.

How were your holidays?  We had wonderful, quiet ones here.  We spent a lot of time together in pajamas or lounge clothes, went out as little as possible and enjoyed the peaceful time.  I worked two days in the middle but even that wasn’t bad. 

We put away Christmas for another year this past weekend.  It takes most of a day to take everything down and wrap it up and pack it away in one of 6 large containers.  Then the tree gets 2 containers of its own, plus one for the lights.  But when all is finished, and the things are put back where they belong and things get dusted and vacuumed, it feels like home again.  I thought we were late this year but I read in the Christmas Book that we did this on the 15th last year so we’re right on schedule.  Did I ever tell you about the Christmas Book?  I started it when Peter Kevin and I were first married.  Each year, I write down the highlights (and comments on the world at large) of our holiday.  It’s fun to read back 35 years worth of Christmases and it reminds us of things we would have forgotten.  Each of the girls has one so that they can start their own books.

Speaking of the girls, Kate is now seven and one half months pregnant and this baby is giving her a rough time.  He/She is very active and poor Kate feels like she has bruised insides. 

I have two interesting projects on the needles (plus about a half dozen different pairs of socks and two shawls).  These are my Lotus mittens.  I enjoy colorwork and you can’t have too many pairs of mittens.

This will be my Hurricane Throw.  The creative women at The Unique Ewe dyed up a set of skeins to match the symbol for Hurricanes that seemed to be ubiquitious there for a while.  This is the color sequence plus some white for clouds.  I found a pattern that looks like a hurricane so I think the two will look good together.

This has been a doozy of a month for us.  The dishwasher needed a new part which made the oven jealous so it decided it wanted attention, too and needed a new part which made the furnace upset so the motor died (during the coldest part of the cold spell),  Pk was able to get the motor to work long enough for us to order a new part and we spent the money to get a kerosene heater which helped keep the house warm enough so no pipes froze.  The new part came and works like a charm.  And all of this with Pk still out of work.  Stress?  Why no.  Why do you ask?

Today I see the cataract surgeon to make the final measurements to have my first cataract removed on Feb 2.  I will admit to a bit of nervousness although he has assured me that it’s “nothing” after the retinal surgery I had 2 years ago.  I just look forward to clear(er) vision.

Work is going well.  We have had a series of inspections which went well. The last one is next week.  It’s a Big one since money is involved.  We don’t want to have to give any back.......

So,that’s it in my world.  I have so much to be grateful for.  Happy Monday.