Tired. So tired. It's Sunday afternoon and I am tired. I try to be a good person and to support my children in their lives. And because of this, today PK and I are beat.


Last December, Kate had a friend she met through the internets come and stay with us for two weeks. It went well and we enjoyed Holly's visit. She lives in Missouri with her father. Fast forward to June when Kate says, "Holly and I want to move into an apartment together and she is coming here in August. Can she stay here until we find a place?" We said yes. And then forgot about it.

A week ago, Kate informs us that Holly and her dad are driving across country and will be here on Friday and he will be staying with us until his plane leaves on Sunday. !!! Now, we expected him to stay overnight one night and then hop a plane home the next day. But, he wanted to stay the weekend and "get to know us". We were not amused. We have tentative plans each weekend to do something fun and relaxing to make up for the stress of being on the go all week for work. Hosting a man we don't know was not my idea of fun or relaxing.

But, I love my daughter and we prepared. They got in at 11:15 Friday night and we took them to the local diner for a bite since they hadn't eaten since the afternoon. Kate and Holly renewed their in-face friendship while we tried to get to know her dad. It was a little awkward and I was tired. Saturday, PK took him to the flea market for some 'rust hunting' and then they unloaded the truck and took it to the rental place. I went to the grocery store and did the laundry. We ordered a bunch of Chinese food and took it to a local park, one with lots of history, thinking it would be an interesting thing for him to see. He is not into history and just wanted to talk about the girls. Now, I am of the opinion that the "girls" are young adults now and they need to make the decisions about their apartment and living arrangements themselves. They will not grow into responsible people if we tell them what to do all the time. He is having some control issues with all of this. Maybe because he will be so far away and I will be only a town away. I am not as worried about the girls. I know that I have raised a responsible young adult and she will be fine. (and withing calling distance if she gets in trouble) After a beautiful sunset over the river, we went home and we entertained him by playing Trivial Pursuit while the girls went out. Three hours later, I was beat and went to bed.
This morning we got up early and went to brunch and then took him to the airport. I felt like I could breathe easier. I feel guilty about this feeling. I think because he changed his plans and didn't ask if it would be ok with us if he stayed longer and didn't worry about whether we had plans. He just assumed we would change our plans to accomodate him. He's not a bad man, just different from us and we were strangers thrown together for two days. Conversation was stilted all weekend and if you don't think that's exhausting, you've never tried to keep someone engaged for hours on end.
But it's over. I made my daughter and her friend happy. She is looking for a job and they already have a lead on an apartment. I may soon have a free room to turn into a long-desired craft room!




I have been working on my shawl and have really enjoyed the pattern and the yarn. You can just see the pattern in this photo. I am further along than this. It is 11" long from top to bottom now, almost half as long as it's supposed to be. The colors are pretty true in this photo and the subtle sheen is there. It is so silky feeling. I am loving it.
And a parting shot of Cape May beach from last weekend. It's funny. Last weekend was busy but so relaxing and wonderful. This weekend, well, it was different. And now I am going to make an angelfood cake for desert for dinner. We're having quiche, salad, a good bread and cake with fresh strawberries. It's making me hungry just thinking about it.
I hope you all had a good weekend.

Comments

amy said…
Kids are one thing, inviting each other over to stay, but I don't think I'd be at all comfortable staying in a complete stranger's house for the weekend. If I were Dad, I'd have rather gotten a hotel room and gotten to know you a little during the day, over lunch.

And you are absolutely right, young adults are perfectly capable of taking off on their own. Even if Kate and her friend find that sharing an apartment was a terrible idea, they're going to learn a lot about themselves and what it takes to live on your own, and with another person. I'm glad I learned those lessons well before my marriage depended on it.
Sheepish Annie said…
I'm not a fan of people who invite themselves over without a thought as to how I might feel about it. Some folks are just so self-centered that it never occurs to them that others might feel differently about stuff.

You are a trouper!
Alwen said…
Yeah, I have a rule for house guests:

They have to either feed me, amuse me, or be related to me.
Olivia said…
Ho-boy. I would be anxious and grumpy about that much social time with an unknown person even if they weren't staying with me.

I recognise your feeling of guilt too. It's silly but I am always tormenting myself for stuff like that. You have NOTHING to feel guilty about!
Galad said…
I'm not good about strangers in my space unless I invite them. I would have been very pissed but polite, which is bad for the blood pressure. You are a trooper!

Glad the weekend is over and hope you get some time to yourself next weekend.
Rose Red said…
I know how you feel about the dad staying - it IS tiring having to entertain someone you don't even know and especially when you don't have much in common. Hope you find some down time during the week to make up for it.
Amy Lane said…
I understand how exhausting that is--trust me, it's why I dread Birthday parties for my kids.

But I'm glad you got some quiet time--and I also know what you mean about 'I trusted my kid and this other parent can't relax!'--that's hard to deal with too. You feel defensive--"Hey--I thought we were doing okay, why are you fixating on why I shouldn't let my kid out of my sight?" Makes me a little crazy!
Bells said…
that was poorly handled (by him) on all counts. I'm sure you and PK did as best as you could in the circumstances. the girls might have given you more notice!!

Being ON with a stranger is really really hard work and yes, we all feel like we could do better under such circumstances. How did PK handle it? Is he better with strangers or was it a trial for him too?
Dianne said…
A stranger in your house - all weekend - that sounds like torture! You are such a good mom. I would have been tempted to boot him out on his hind end. Not really, but a girl can dream, can't she? :)
Jeanne said…
Having a stranger in your house all weekend sounds very stressful - and wow - how nice of you to agree to it. I'm not sure I'd be that nice! The shawl is pretty - and I hope your next weekend is nicer....
Roxie said…
Oh yes - anelfood cake with strawberries! You deserve it! Hosting a total stranger for a whole weekend IS exhausting. You and PK are real heroes, and kind, kind people. Now Daddy dearest knows his baby girl has a secure lifeline just one town over. You are such good people!

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