Mother's Day.  I have mixed feelings about this day.  I am forced for at least a few minutes to confront my own conflicting feelings about my mother and our relationship (or the lack thereof).  There are things I am sorry for and things that I had no control over and I have decided to let myself off the hook.  Do I wish things had been different?  You bet.  I tried but somehow I was never good enough. 

I miss my 'other mother', my Aunt Joan.  I have yet to delete her number from my cell phone because I like the thought that she's out there somewhere waiting for my call.  Now there's an idea for a story.  A magic cell phone that stores numbers of dead loved ones and we can call them.  Stephen King could turn it into something fascinating and horrible but for me, it's slightly comforting.

For myself, Mother's Day is odd.  I'm used to being the one doing the 'taking care of ' and having Pk and Elanor downstairs in the kitchen making me breakfast is odd.  I have to stay out of their way.  I don't want to tell them how I would do things.  I need to leave them be.  Pk makes a delicious omlette and it's better if I just stay out of the kitchen.  (I did go down to get a cup of coffee and a donut while I'm waiting and I was definitely in the way).

Kate made lasagna for dinner last night (delicious!) since she and Patrick are headed out to upstate PA for a camping trip today.  I don't have to cook all weekend.  Not a bad deal.  She gave me two skeins of pale pink Manos del Uruguay merino/silk yarn.  It's a beautiful yarn (she liked the idea that independent artisans all over Uruguay make it).  I have some slightly darker pink merino/angora singles that I've put up against this.  They might make a nice pair of mittens for me for next winter.
These are the locks I bought last weekend.  Kate carded hers together and isn't thrilled with the way the color came out.  I'm going to flick card them just a bit and then spin them as locks instead of a batt. I'm thinking they might make a beautiful lace weight yarn.  They are so curly! 

When I was a little girl, I had curly hair.  My mother hated brushing it and always kept it cut short.  I got Scarlet Fever when I was young and the curl literally fell out of my hair.  I have wavy hair now but not nearly as curly as when I was younger.  (I am still growing my hair.  It's almost to my shoulders at this point.  Just long enough to make a teeny tiny pony tail)

This is my Mother's Day present.  It is amazing and wonderful.  I have plied one skein of yarn and have 3 and a half bobbins full to ply another today.  I love my Kiwi wheel but those smallish bobbins mean than when you spin for a large project, there is a lot of tying skeins together.  This will cut that number in half.  I have one full bump of wool and about a half of another to spin.  I love watching the skeins of yarn pile up.  I washed and blocked the swatch and am in love with the way it looks.   I can't wait to finish spinning the yarn so I can start knitting the sweater  .Pk offered to make me buttons for it.  I like the idea of a totally handcrafted sweater.    This is a satisfying project.  Pk has asked for a cardigan and once this is finished, I'll look around for a pattern for something for him.  I may just purchase the yarn this time!

I made it through the first week without having to go in for jury duty.  One more week to go.  I have to call on Monday after 5 to see about Tuesday.  Last week, on Monday they said to check in on Wed.  On Wed they said to check back in on Friday.  On Friday, they said to check back in on Monday (tomorrow).  I'm glad not to be called but I think it would be easier to just spend one day sitting in a jury selection room and be done with it than calling every other day and not being able to make any plans.

I cast on for my Bigger on the Inside. I am making one at work with one of my coworkers.  It took an hour on Friday for us to get through the first part (you cast on one stitch and gradually increase to 10 stitches) but she was determined.  Unfortunately, the first part is a lace pattern so it is going to be a challenge for her.  When we finish this part and move onto the knitted part, that should be easier.

I've been listening to the audio version of the Lord of the Rings.  It's still exciting to me after all these years and the number of times I've read it.  The first time was in 1972 and probably once a year for every year since then.  Listening to it is a joy except for the parts where the narrator sings.  Dwarf songs are not meant to be sung by humans.  All I'm gonna say.

Wherever you are this lovely Sunday and whatever you're doing, I wish you a peaceful day.


DrK said…
ah mothers day. its funny isnt it, some people make it all about themselves as mothers but i always see it as being about your own mother. so its a hard day for me too, all the sentimental tripe about how great mothers are and how thankful we should be. thats not my experience and i always feel the loss of someone to celebrate today as well. but its a day that also makes me think of people like you, who are good mothers and love and care for people as we are meant to do. so im glad you got taken care of and given nice things because you thoroughly deserve it. k xx
Galad said…
This was an odd Mother's Day for us as this is the first year both of our mothers are gone.

I wound up cooking dinner again tonight for Nicole and Patrick so made my mother's banana split dessert. I've been thinking about her a lot this weekend and it just seemed right.
Rose Red said…
I'm a bit behind on blog reading so just caught up on your whole week.
You were very restrained at MDSW! Much better than me in a similar situation, I am hopeless!
I am not really into the commerciality of mothers day (especially not all the pink stuff they try to sell for mothers, as if mothers automatically become people who only love pink, ugh. But it is nice to be appreciated by your kids, and looked after, instead of being the ine who always does the looking after of others. I'm glad you had a lovely day and weremsuitably looked after!
KnitTech said…
Grilltech doesn't make breakfast's, but his dinners are amazing!
Roxie said…
It cane very hard for the caretaker to let go of the job. Once a year is good practice for you.

Picking out a Mother's Day card was always hard for me. The ones that say, "You were always there for me." or, "You made me feel so special." or "I don't know what I would do without you." really never fit. I think there is a wonderful niche for Mother's Day cards that say, "Thinking of you and wishing you a happy Mother's Day." So those of us with imperfect relationships can do the right thing without feeling like hypocrites

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